Is He The One For Me???

Today I went home late at night. I have been talking with Mary and we are talking about what life is…. What is expected and what is unexpected….

I have heard many stories about marriage from other people. It makes me worried and its frighten me to hear all this. After years of marriage…in the end after we are in the age of 40…we got divorce…. Its hurts the woman to be divorce in that kind of age. :’(

When I went home…I read a post of Mia. I feel sorry for her (Really…I am). It makes me worried about my own future…

And now…at this moment…. I am thinking…Is he really the right person for me? Will he still be with me after years and years of marriage…I am getting paranoid of it.

People around me (that I know..) got divorce after 10-30 years of marriage and living together….. What really happen actually?

In the end…I am stranded in my own thinking. And hoping for the great future with him….Amin….

Still In Love With You…My Dear Husband….

Published in:  on November 15, 2008 at 4:15 pm Leave a Comment
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Past And Present~~~

Today…I am taking my half-day. I plan to go to the bank. To ask about the house and the land. U know…loan thing-ing. I bring Mia along with me. We talk about leen, house, land and house…hehe…

At first, we went to the bank as I want to know the process of home loan. And then…we went to the mall to buy a donut…Just a donut…Hehehe… As soon as we finish buying a donut…we straightaway went to some places. Hehehe…

Then, we went to Sg Hanching at my land there. After that, we went to see her land at Jerudong. As on the way to bring her home… I started to laugh….

“Time passed by…Few years back…I never think of having a house and this and that about my future. I don’t give a shit what will my future will be. At that time…I only think how to enjoy myself tonight. Whats my plan for tonight? Where should I hang out? Only that… Never that I think about my future…

As now, I am a bit mature…I start to think to have a nice family and especially….my own house. I start to think…how many rooms should I build…for my future child(rens)… If my past friends got to meet me again nowadays…They might be a bit surprise for my changes. Well… I am very “jahat” a long time ago. Hahaha…

As many people said..Life goes on. My life never stop there. My past never come back to me and haunt me anymore. I left it behind as I never want to turn back to my past life. Its horrible and scary and I have always regret for what I have done before as I have disappointed everyone of my family. Huhhh… I never want to remember that. It makes me want to hit my own head and let it bleed… I am proud to have my family here…. They are very positive about me and they are very patient with all my doings…All my sins…All that I have done before… Thank you….

Few years after that… I change to be a better person. Much better than what people predict it. Whats make my family more happy.. I never come back to my past again… I don’t even glance at it…. Yokatta….

To my family..Thank you for always been there for me and always encourage me to go on with my life and never let me giving up with this life. Thank you….

Published in:  on November 14, 2008 at 11:48 am Comments (1)
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Life Goes On…

It’s been a week since I lost my baby… I have to go on. Time will not awaits me. I need to catch up with my life right now.

Last night, my husband gone back to his workplace. I am gonna be left alone AGAIN. I cry and I cry whenever I remember my baby.

I hate being left alone here. When I am alone, it just keep getting into my head. My baby. My baby. And I will start crying again.

Oh God…please give me a strength to face all this. Amin….

Published in:  on March 11, 2008 at 6:00 am Leave a Comment
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